Not thin enough
by Rocky57251isYoUrHiGhNeSs
Summary: Its not always easy being Ceces bff. Shes liked by everone and can eat whatever she wants without getting fat. Rocky is always happy and doesnt care..or so it seems. The real reason Cece is beautiful is because of her confidence and Rocky learns this with some help from someone who care. Eating disorder warning
1. The start of it all

Ok guys please review

Rocky's POV

All night I could only think of one thing. What that man had said it kept replaying over and over again.

_"Ok all my new back up dancer's line up" Gary had said. Cece, Rocky, and all the other dancers all screamed with excitement. They all knew why he was calling them. Every dancer on shake it up got seen by a talent_ _agent and had the chance to become the poster dancer for shake it up._

_As Rocky looked up with excitement she saw the famous agent Steve Marco. He knew how to make dreams come true, he had all the right connections, and he was the manager of almost all good models. He knew how to make it happen. Soon it was cece's turn and Rocky heard all the praise coming from Steve._

_"And what is your name my spunky friend?" he asked._

_"I am the one, and only, Cece Jones." Cece was so confident she had no doubt that she was the one._

_And it was over, just like that. Then it was Rocky's turn._

_As soon as he saw her he frowned._

_"A little large aren't you?" as soon as he asked Rocky smiled._

_"Yeah I'm really tall; I get it from my dad."_

_"So where do you get your largess from?"_

_And Rocky finally understood. He was calling her fat. She didn't finish talking to him, it was way to embarrassing for her and she left._

The next day

For the first time in a long time Rocky didn't want to go to school. Maybe she could skip and finally let go of her goody goody look. She decided against it. As soon as she was down to Cece's she saw Logan cooking eggs and she blushed.

"Hey Rocky um Sissy isn't going to be down for a while so you might as well get comfortable." Logan said.

Rocky grinned staring at him not caring how dumb she looked. Then as she saw him get up and move "Hey Rocky do you want any food?" Logan asked.

"No thanks I'm not really hungry. I already ate Breakfast" Rocky said.

Rocky had unconsciously made the first move that would help her make a VERY dangerous decision of her life. Just then Cece ran downstairs and scoffed at Logan.

"What did I tell you about talking to my friends" Cece said.

Rocky was confused Logan and Cece had stopped arguing with each other a few months ago and it was rare to see a morning where Logan and Cece didn't get along.

"Not here, not now, and definitely not in front of her" Logan said, shooting his stepsister a warning look.

Rocky watched Cece sit down at the table and stuff her face.

And without thinking about it she admired her tiny friend. Oh how she longed to look like her.

Ok guys this is just a redo of the first chapter. Thank you so much I felt as if to keep moving with the story I had to redo the first chapter to make sure that you guys got what you want.


	2. We meet Lana

(Rocky's POV)

All day I had dreaded going to the studio. All the other dancers were ecstatic were ecstatic and couldn't stop talking about it.

"I heard that he's going to bring Lana Nguyen with him." I was sitting at the lunch table with Cece. Deuce, Tinka, Gunther, and a whole bunch of other back up dancers. We all knew who Lana Nguyen was. She was Steve Marco's youngest success story and everyone who met her had said that she was a total sweetie.

"Did you just say Lana?" I hadn't even noticed that Logan was at our table.

"Yeah is that a problem?" Cece asked. Logan didn't answer he just got a faraway look in his eyes. I sighed it seemed like everyone had their own secrets except for me.

"Rocky are you ok? You haven't even eaten anything yet." Cece's attention was on me and I could feel her eyes watching me.

"Yeah I'm just not hungry." I answered. That was a complete lie. I could hear my stomach growling and all I had eaten was…5 apple slices. Well to be exact I drank orange juice and then I had my apples.

Logan's POV

As Rocky said that she wasn't hungry I couldn't help but too look at her suspiciously. Isn't that what she said this morning when I asked her if she wanted any breakfast? I shook it off, though as I thought about the name Lana sounded really familiar.

"Hey do you have a picture of this, Lana girl?" I asked. I really wanted to see a picture of her.

"Um yeah" Rocky said as she pulled a picture out of her bag. To be more exact she pulled out a biographical book.

"Why do you care anyway?" Cece asked as Rocky handed me the book.

"Is this a published book?" I asked Rocky.

She blushed as she replied. "Um no I kind of just made this up from information I found on her and some pictures." I looked at the picture of the girl that she had handed me. And I was sure that I had seen her before. She had long shiny black hair and amber colored eyes. Those eyes looked so familiar. And then I noticed brown highlights in her hair. To be more exact, natural brown highlights.

"Hey Cece does this girl look familiar to you?" I looked at her as she rolled her eyes.

"No duh she's only one of the most famous 13 year old dancers/ models in the world at the moment".

"No I mean does she look like anyone that you've met before?"

"Well actually she looks a little like you. NOT" She grinned.

Rocky's POV

We were all at the studio waiting for Mr. Marco to arrive. When he did we were not disappointed. He arrived with a beautiful girl that was our age. And I had no doubt that she was Lana Nguyen.

"Ok everyone Steve Marco is just here observing and Lana is just here dancing so yeah get back to work." Gary said. Just then I saw something move. It was Logan. I hurried over to him.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him.

"I just came to see the model." He said. I don't know why but as soon as he said that a little part of me go mad.

"Oh. Well just so you know she said that she wants to be treated like a regular girl." I said lamely. Then I turned around and I was shocked to see the model coming toward us.

"Hi your Rocky right?" she asked with a sincerely sweet smile.

"Um yep I'm Rocky, Rocky is my name for sure, and dancing is probably my game." I mentally slapped myself as I blushed profusely.

"Do I know you?" she asked Logan. But it wasn't rudely it was like she was honestly curious because she wanted to know if she knew him.

"I got that feeling to but I don't think that we've met." He replied.

"Oh big brother of mine what are you doing? Especially hanging out with my friend?" she shot him a mean look as he blushed bright red and shot me a nervous look.

60 minutes later

People are right. Lana is a real sweetie and she is just like any normal girl. Soon we all noticed Steve put his file folders down. Now was the time. First Cece grabbed her folder and a big smile appeared on her face as she showed me what her file folder said. Spunky is the only world that you could use to describe her. She would be a terrific model, has confidence and the looks, not to mention the proper size, if only she was taller. That gave me the confidence to grab my folder. As I read it the smile disappeared from my face. She is tall and has the potential to be a good dancer but she cannot spin well, or do good flips because of her weight.

"It's ok Rocky. Steve wants everyone to be perfectly skinny." I jumped as I heard the voice and spun around hoping that it wasn't Cece. But it wasn't it was Lana.

Ok guys opinions please. Sorry it would have been longer but my mom was being annoying and I really wanted to post it today so that I could focus on my story All for a friend tomorrow.


	3. The fake files

Hey guys im so sorry it took me so long. But im on summer break right now and I am ready to make stories soo…ENJOY!

(Rocky)

It felt really weird to have a girl as thin as Lana knowing my big secret. I was humiliated. Just then Cece walked over.

"Hey what are you guys being so secretive about over here?" she asked. She made it sound casual but I knew her to well to believe that she was only asking for no reason. She just didn't want me to have a friend that didn't talk to her. Just then we were interrupted by the other back up dancers whispering "Steve is coming!" There was a wild hustle as everyone hurried to put their files away. Steve came in with a big smile on his face.

"You read your files didn't you?" he asked.

We all nodded our heads.

"Well then you will be happy to know that those were not the real files." I looked at him as a large smirk appeared on his ugly face.

"What I wrote in those files were lies for most of you". He said. "But for some off you those files were more than true." I looked up and his beady black eyes stared at me.

"Now get back to work."

2 hours later

I was at home in the apartment staring into the fridge. As I looked through the contents of it there was a knock on the door. Soon Cece walked in.

"Hey your window wasn't open what's up with that?" she asked me.

The real truth was that I really didn't want to see her but oh well.

Sorry im feeling lazy and still getting into the swing of things a new, and better chapter will be added by Thursday. BYE!


	4. Rocky meets Ana

Hey! I told you I would update and I did! Virtual cookies to meJ

Rocky's POV

I finally quit searching through the fridge realizing that no matter how many times I searched through it healthy food would not just magically appear. I grin as I turn around and catch CeCe stuffing her face with food from….MY fridge. Hey! When did that happen? I ignore it using this chance to talk to CeCe.

"Hey um CeCe." I say timidly.

"Yes?" She says and I can't help but notice that she is stuffing her face with pie. My pie to be more exact!  
"Do you think that Logan has, I don't know, a crush on Lana by any chance?" I ask her. I guess that they must tell each other at least some secrets. It's pretty hard to live in an apartment with someone and not tell them ANY of your secrets.

"How am I supposed to know!" she screams. I'm surprised it wasn't really that big of a deal.

"Um ok chill out alright." I said glaring at her.

"You're not falling for him right?" She asked in a soft voice. I want to answer truthfully and maybe have the chance to actually admit something about myself for once.

"CeCe honestly I can't see why you would care so much about it." I said.

"Because he is my step brother now and it would be really weird if one of my friends went out with him or liked him." She sounded kind of nervous.

"CeCe even if I did go out with Logan I would never ditch you." There was a moment of silence that made me feel kind of awkward so I pulled my legs up to my chest.

"CeCe Lana is really cool isn't she?" Immediately CeCe got a weird look on her face as she glared at me.

"You know when I come to you I come to hear about myself not a bunch of new friend that your suddenly ditching me for!" she screamed as she ran through the front door. I looked after her confused. But i don't go after her. Everybody close enough to CeCe knows that the best thing to do when she is angry is to give her some space. So instead i grab my phone. to text her.

Message:

Rocky: CeCe you know i would never replace you right?

CeCe: I know its just, things are changing and i don't like it.

Rocky: If anything you'll be replacing me

CeCe: No way. Can we have a sleepover?

Rocky: yeah sure but Logan, Deuce, Gunther, and Ty are having one too

CeCe: Yay! we can play truth or dare.

* * *

After a long horrible game of truth or dare( lets just say a lot of boys ended up getting lap dances) my head hit the pillow. Immediately I wished that it hadn't.

In my dream I saw CeCe walking with a girl who looked like she was really popular and pretty. In a way she kind of looked like a better version of me. Her and CeCe were holding hands and walking down the street. She had hair kind of like mine but it was longer so it was wavier, she was really skinny with pink skinny jeans on, and she had on a lace top that went down mid thigh.

"I'm Ana."I heard the strange girl saying. I looked at her amazed. She even kind of had my voice but because she was so much skinnier it sound more airy. She looked as delicate and fragile as cheap feather earrings from Claires. (I love them but their feather earrings are made of REALLY cheap material) I couldn't take it anymore and rushed to CeCe.

"Hey CeCe do you want to go shopping with me?" I asked as I rush toward her pretending that I didn't see Ana.

"No thanks Rocky, Ana and I have a double date with Deuce and Logan." She said. She seemed to remember that she hadn't introduced us to each other and so she stretched both of their hands toward each other.

"Rocky this is Ana. And Ana this is Rocky. Now come on Ana we are going to be late." CeCe says.

I was suddenly pushed forward into my dream and I was soon at Shake it up Chicago but I wasn't actually dancing. everyone was watching Ana do what seemed to be an audition to become a dancer on Shake it up.

"Rocky you're fired. Ana your hired." I looked at Gary in shock. He had said that he would never ever fire me; he had said that I could spin and dance like it was nobody's business. Just then I saw Steve walk out of his office with Lana following behind. I turned the other way to see that CeCe had just given Ana a hug. I had to resist the urge to cry. CeCe hated touching other people or having other people touching her and it had taken me 2 years to get CeCe to even let me give her a hug, and here Ana comes and gets everything that I used to have and more.

"Good job you needed to fire that fat Slob anyway it's about time." That is the last thing that i heard before I was, once again pushed through my dream.

This time I can see that I am climbing through the window.

"Hey, hey, hey!" I say my signature greeting.

As i look up i see someone kissing Logan. I know who it is almost immediately. It's….Ana! I am just about to say something when CeCe walks into the room. I know that there is no need to say anything now because CeCe absolutely hates it when people fall for Logan.

"Hey how's my favorite couple?" CeCe asks with a grin on her face.

"Eww what are you doing here?"She asks as she turns around and sees me.

"I thought you said that Logan was off limits to all of your friends." I say ignoring her rude question.

"Look you creep I already sent you a text saying that we can't be friends any more so get the hell out of my apartment." she screams. I am shocked but I hold my ground.

"I thought you said none of your friends were allowed to date Logan." I say once again.

"Yeah well that was back when I still hung out with YOU!" CeCe said.

"Yeah now she has better friends that are waaay hotter." Logan adds.

"But we're bffls." I say looking at CeCe.

"We WERE. Now I just don't know why I even spoke to you." CeCe says.

"Fine I'll leave I just need to say one more thing to Logan. I thought you liked me." I say and it was clear that i was heartbroken.

"I used to then I realized how gross you are." He replied. I just then noticed that Ana hasn't said anything to me. She seems to know that her perfection hurts me enough. She didn't want to waste her energy on doing unnecessary things.

"Oh. Why did you pick her?"I asked and I almost didn't hear the answer because suddenly I was being whooshed out of the dream.

"The skinny girl always wins." I thought I heard Ana's feathery voice say right before I was whooshed out.

* * *

as I woke up I realized that I was covered in a cold sweat. I felt really nauseous. I was rushing to the bathroom when I bumped into Logan, who had, btw slept over to hang out with Ty.

"Whats wrong?" he asks me.

"I'm going to puke." I say plainly as I shove him out of the way before he could even react by doing something. As he turned around to go help he heard the door click signaling that it had been locked and he listened to her heave the small amount of food that she had eaten into the toilet. When she came back out after brushing her teeth he had already left tired of waiting for her to let him in. But he didn't leave me completely alone as I looked down I saw a glass of water and a note.

_Hey Rocky sorry I had to leave. You weren't letting me in anyway and Ty would have gotten suspicious if I had stayed for too long so I left you this note. Anyway hope you feel better and sorry that you feel so horrible right now._

_Love,_

_Logan_

My heart fluttered. Logan had really written love there. Could he love me?

"Rocky, Rocky, Rocky, don't you know only the skinny girls get what they want." I don't have to turn around. I can recognize that feathery voice anywhere. Ana.

* * *

Hehe I know I'm evil. I finished this at 2:38 Thursday morning because I remembered that I had told you guys that I would be updating on Thursday and after adding a chapter for my new story fears and scars (btw, please read ALL my stories) I was really exhausted when I realized that I didn't even have a single line of the new chapter written. But I don't care it's all for the wonderful people who read my stories and you guys deserve it and I was being forgetful so it's my fault. I am tired of taking so long to update so do not worry I will be updating more often. As for the cliffy no virtual pies thrown at me please. Preferably virtual cake... it tastes sooo good. Love yall sorry for the mistakes babes. I would say sorry for the cliffy but i'm not sooo…get over it. New chappy by Sunday! well i was typing this at 2:38 but i'm uploading it at one or earlier. definitely not my best but..Oh well.


	5. Advice from Ana

Rocky: Hey my peoples I kind of did this last minute

Finger #1: Yeah cuz she forgot about you

Rocky: Give me a break I was watching Johnny Test

Finger #2: So you think that Johnny Test is more important that your readers

Rocky: Moving on, next on the schedule is….Shout outs!

Purplekatz402: You shall find out in the next chapter!

Therock: Thank you sooooooooooooooo much the whole time I was writing the chapter I was trying to figure out why it seemed so boring, and now I know its cuz there was no emotion!

Rarity01: I was looking but I couldn't find it sorry

nayna97: thanks for letting me know you liked it

(Rocky's POV)

I blushed as I woke up in the morning to Logan staring at me.

"What are you doing in my room?" I asked him blushing even more as I looked down on my purple spandex shorts and my red spaghetti strap top.

"You're not in your room." He said with a grin. "After you were done puking you probably came out here."

I looked around and noticed that I was on the couch.

"By the way, are you ok?" He asked. Just then I heard a voice.

_Tell him you're sick._

"Yeah I'm fine I probably just have a cold or food poisoning."I said following the directions of the feathery voice.

"Ok I'm going to go make some breakfast I'll be right back" he said. As he left I had a weird urge to call him back and ask him to stay…but of course…I didn't.

_Aww little Rocky has a crush. Too bad she's too fat for him._

"I am not too fat!" I screamed.

"What did you say?" Logan asked.

Eh not in the mood to finish sorry. But cuz its so short you should have a longer chappy by Tuesday. You can look forward to more ANArexia drama(Purplekatz402 *hint* *hint*) possibly some Rogan drama and some…..STUFF involving Lana. Sorry babes to lazy to write a long chapter today btw has anyone listened to we cant stop by Miley Cyrus?


	6. All about Lana

Rocky: Hey my peoples

Finger #1: She didn't forget about you this time

Rocky: Shut up, moving on to the responses to your reviews

Rarity01: omg your only 12 that was twirckin (my own word) awesome. Well actually none of the stories on this account are mine. I made the account but my 11 year old lil sis writes them. Respect to the little people everyone. So if you wonder why the chapters are so short sometimes it's because she's only 11 and has a short attention span. She most of the time is the one that pms people to. Like I'm the 11 year old answering reviews right now.

TheRock: yeah sorry I was being lazy

Purplekatz402: LOL hope you get over that cold soon. Joking, here it is. Man my readers totally crack me up.

Guest: I'm OK with runther but I hate, hate, HATE, Cogan. They could go die in a hole for all I care I absolutely cannot stand them they piss me off. It's like Rocky finally got somebody that's interested in her and of course people want CeCe to come along and get everything as usual. In the show it kind of annoys me how it's always about CeCe. That being said, I have nothing against the Cogan shippers. I mean I just can't see why CeCe would go out with the person that she hates. And i just can't see why everyone thinks that everything good should always happen to CeCe

ProudlyUnique: first of all, I LOVE your username. And here is your update.

fortheloveofchocolate: Yeah, yeah, yeah i know i'm lazy sorry.

xxwinterbeautyxx: We'll see. Maybe he will maybe he won't.

* * *

Rocky's POV

I groan as I stare at the mirror. It's been 2 weeks since Ana appeared. 2 weeks of pain. 2 weeks of having my thoughts invaded. I don't understand the pain though. It's just a diet, there should be no pain. But no matter how many times I get mad at Ana I still follow her directions. No matter how many times she invades my thoughts, or calls me names, I can't bring myself to stop following her directions. If she tells me to lie I lie, if she tells me not to eat I don't eat, and I'm guessing that if she told me to get rid of CeCe I probably would. Just then my phone buzzes signaling that I have a text message.

CeCe: hurry up I'm waiting

I sigh. I kind of forgot about having to go get her.

Rocky: Coming

I groan again as I looked in my full length mirror. I'm wearing a purple tutu with leggings a purple and black crop top and my favorite Doc martins.

_Not bad. It's a good thing that you know how to layer. All the layers distract people from your awful body._

I know better than to ignore the voice inside my head. Ana would just get even more annoyed and she would just keep spitting out the truth. I am just about to leave and get CeCe so we can walk to school together when Ty comes out of his room.

"Come on, my friend Charlie can give you and CeCe a ride." He said.

* * *

At school

I grin as I walk into school. I know what's coming next.

"Hey Rocky." Everybody calls out as we get there. We are like celebrities at school. Everyone wants to talk to us and everyone wants to be able to brag that CeCe and I are friends with them or that we even spoke to them. Heck everyone wants to be us.

"Oh my god CeCe is here!" So many people call out our names and even though it's hard to tell for sure I am almost positive that more people say her name than the people who say my name. And why shouldn't they? She's skinnier and more beautiful. She has the confidence that I can only dream about. Not to mention the gap in between her thighs. I wish i could look like her. Then maybe Logan would ask me out. (in the story they haven't dated yet.)

Then that little voice in my head is back and it's tormenting me again.

_I wonder why they would want to say hi to a little fatty like you._

Immediately I stop grinning and start rushing over to my locker. I'm not far from my locker when someone grabs my arm. As I spin around I see Lana looking at me.

"Oh my god what are you doing here?" I ask her. It's in a somewhat good way I guess but I can't help but thing about what's going to happen when Logan gets here. I hate to admit it but it's hard not to feel angry when Logan looks at her. He looks at her kind of the same way that he looks at me and I absolutely hate it.

"Well Steve and my parent's think that I need to have a more stable upbringing so until Steve picks the dancers who are going to be models I am staying here!" She says. I immediately feel a pang of guilt. She seems so happy and innocent. I feel so sorry for her. Because middle school is going to eat her up.

* * *

As I sit down in lunch it becomes a little bit harder to feel sorry for her. She's telling everyone about how her first day of school is going so far and Logan is staring at her. I have a sudden urge to scream at him and tell him to take a picture of her because it will last longer. I of course don't say that though because I have to be the sweet little Rocky that they know. The only person not paying attention to Lana is CeCe. And it's not like shes paying attention to me anyway. Instead she is busy staring At Jake Demarks. And I have the sudden urge to say the same thing to her that I want to say to Logan. As I think about it I almost giggle. How could two people who think that they are nothing like each other be so, well, like each other? I sigh as I get up and dump my tray in the trash so that I can head to the library. The one good thing that came out of the horrible lunch period was that nobody noticed that I wasn't eating so I didn't have to lie about it. Lying had become a kind of game for me now. I no longer had to stop and think about it. The words flowed out of my mouth like Diarrhea from a butt hole.

_See Rocky you're so called friends aren't as good as you thought they were huh?_

_I mean i knew that I wouldn't have to tell you to get rid of that red head. Do you see how skinny she is? I bet you wish that you could look like that huh?_

I don't answer. I mean I haven't answered her since that ridiculous morning after the sleepover. It took a lot of explaining but I was finally able to convince Logan, who was a little bit suspicious that I had been writing a book and had just gotten some inspiration for it. Now I'm more careful. That night Ana made me make up for my mistake. I felt so guilty that I did 100 curl ups. But that was of course in the beginning. Now I can do many , many more than that. The morning after the sleepover i wasn't used to her yet. Now i of course know that she is just me. That still doesn't stop me from being scared of her though.

* * *

I groan. It's finally time for shake it up Chicago practice and my muscles are really sore. To top it all off Steve helped choreograph the dance and the boys are going to be lifting the girls up. I frown as Steve reads off the pairings for the lifts. Ty is standing next to him. Ty and Gary take turns hosting shake it up Chicago and since Gary hosted the show last week this time its Ty's turn. When Steve finally reads my name. My name should have been what of the first ones read since he was going in alphabetical order by last name, but of course he put me dead last. When he does finally read my name it turns out that i am with Timothy James. All the other girls look at me and make it quiet obvious that they are jealous of me but I blush. I am very happy that the other girls haven't realized what it meant. You see for lifts you have to pair people up by there size. The thin boys get the skinny girls, and the muscular boys get the not so skinny girls. The fat girls and the super skinny guys just dance on the sidelines.

The very first time that Timothy "lifts" me in the air he practically throws me and my back touches the ceiling.

"I said lifts not throws" Steve says as he looks over. He grins at me. And even though I am shocked, I know why. He's happy just like I'm happy because we both know that the old before Ana, Rocky wouldn't have even came close to the ceiling. As I turn around I realize that everyone is watching us, and during break all the girls immediately come to talk to me.

"How did it feel to have Timothy's hands around your body?" Lana asks. I turn around. I kind of forgot that she was there. I don't answer and I instead turn around to see the boys all crowded around Timothy.

_Why do they all want to touch you? You're a disgusting fat slob._

I have no time to dwell on what the voice has said once again because I hear a loud voice from the other side of the room. It's not loud enough that everyone who is talking really loud can hair but it is loud enough for me to barely notice.

"People like you who only want her for her body don't deserve wonderful people like her." Logan says. I blush I thought that he had a huge crush on Lana but I guess I was wrong, he seemed pretty interested in me back there.

* * *

I grin (dang she sure is doing a lot of grinning and frowning in this chapter huh?). Dance practice is finally over and as I walk out all the boys whistle at me. As I turn around I slam right into Logan.

"Don't get to caught up in the attention and ditch your real friends." He says.

"What do you mean?" I ask him.

"Don't think that I didn't notice you get up and leave during lunch." I'm surprised I didn't think that he had noticed.

"So?" I shoot back and this time he's the one that seems a little shocked.

"Ever since Lana came you don't even talk to me. You only come to dance practice to stare at Lana. And when dance practice is done you still don't even talk to me. You should not be the one telling me what to do right now. You're such a hypocrite. You're the one that should know better than to ditch your own friends because guess what in the end Lana has to leave and you will be stuck with the people that you haven't even spoke to since she came. Haven't you ever heard of practice what you preach?" and with that final question I leave him staring after me with a stunned look on his face. As CeCe and I walk home together I think about my outburst. I am not really mad at him but I am little frustrated that he hadn't really talked to me in 2 weeks and the first thing that he says to me after I have thought and thought about him, wasn't even something nice. I am so sick and tired of people thinking that they knew me. Maybe that was why I kept Ana away from them, so that I could have something that they didn't know about me. But I stopped thinking about why I hid Ana because at the end of the day when you're trying to work off all the fatty things that you've ate you don't think about why you are, you just know that you are.

* * *

Ok not very dramatic but I will be updating a new and more dramatic chapter by Friday. Or MAYBE earlier. But I have to work on my other story All for a friend cuz, well, I cant stop putting off my work. And i would like to mention, this is my longest chapter EVER. Oh yeah and i finished this at 2:34 in the morning. No worries my anxiety was acting up anyway and i couldn't sleep so oh well. This chapter was setting upp for a more dramatic next chapter.


	7. Not so perfect after All

Ok so today I'm getting straight to it

ProudlyUnique: Thank you sooo much. And no problem. Thank YOU for reading.

xxwinterbeautyxx: Thanks

Therock: yeah that part was a mess up.

Rarity01: Wow thank you sooo much when I read your review I couldn't stop smiling and screaming

Guest: Yep I totally was about to add them and thanks

Ok so let's get this party started my peoples

Rocky's POV

I sighed as I hopped into the shower. I had just finished my morning jog. In the beginning I would have to force myself not to stop after I had been running for 30 minutes, but now I just thought about looking like CeCe and bam! I didn't think about stopping again. As I hopped out of the shower I put on a basic pink short sleeved top and my flowered rompers. I tugged a comb through my long wet curls. I did that all without thinking about it. Then I stepped on the scale.

118.2 the scale read. I groaned it was still way to high.

_Oh Rocky look at you finally losing weight. I told you that it wouldn't be hard. I'm surprised you have the guts to resist the urge to eat. Don't get to happy though. You still haven't been approved by Steve._

I blushed. Steve and Ana have become my motivators. I'm not really sure if Steve noticed it but he was. Since I was 5'10 (in the beginning i could have sworn that i put 5,10.) I am only slightly underweight and to tell you the truth I refuse to stop until Logan or CeCe notices.

Logan POV

Rocky and I haven't talked in three weeks. To tell you the truth I don't really miss her as much as I thought I would. I have Lana to keep me company now. Rocky has kind of withdrawn and must of the time at the lunch table she gets up and leaves as soon as she thinks everyone is distracted. I am pretty sure that she is just secretly hanging out with the populars. Now she only talks to CeCe, Flynn, Tinka, and Deuce. She has completely quit talking to Lana and I. Not that we care anyway. I am sick of Rocky thinking that we need her to be happy. I just can't take it. It's so obvious that she is only leaving us because she wants to see the whole group fall apart and come running to her but she should just give up then because it's never going to happen. I wonder how she could be so selfish. After I get out of the shower and I have put fresh clothes on I am about to start breakfast when Rocky climbs through the window.

"Hey, hey, hey," she says. I roll my eyes.

"She's not up idiot," I said. Lately it has really been ticking me off that she keeps leaving our table thinking that she's too good for us.

"You know what Logan just shut up ok. Nobody wants to look at your hideous face or listen to your cracking voice because you're finally going through puberty!" Rocky said. She has defiantly changed since Lana came. I think it's because she thinks that she's cool for hanging out with someone as awesome as Lana.

"Wow. Was that supposed to be a joke? Cuz it wasn't funny. Do you even know what a good joke is?" I ask. Now i was getting frustrated.

"Of course i do. I've seen your face haven't i?" She shoots back.

"Shut up. You're just a conceited, selfish, wannabe. You think that you're too cool to hang out with us now that Lana is here. Well guess what? Lana is too good for you anyway and so am I." I imagined tears building up in her eyes. I kind of hoped for it. To my surprise her looked hardened. I was shock. That was defiantly not the Rocky that I used to know. Rocky looked like she was about to slap me.

"Shut up you jerk! Don't ever talk to my best friend like that again." I spun around to see CeCe still in her robe. She looked even more outraged than Rocky.

"CeCe, shut up. Haven't you realized how much she's changed? She thinks that she's all that all of a sudden. And you know what? I hate her! She always acts like she has the hardest life ever and you know what? She doesn't!" I stared at Rocky waiting for a reaction but all she did was stand there.

"Logan you're a jerk! Come on Rocky!" CeCe says as she grabs Rocky's hand.

* * *

Ty and I were hanging out with Flynn. It seemed like he hadn't found out what I said to Rocky yet. I noticed that he was being kind of quiet and asked what happened.

"Rocky found out that my dad was cheating on my mom and my mom didn't know so now things are really weird at my place. Then it all sank in.

I had said that Rocky had a perfect life. Oops, my mistake.

* * *

Sorry guys I might be getting braces and I cant really focus so im just leaving it like this. new chappy by Wednesday at the latest. Sorry guys


	8. Stronger

Rocky: hey guys! Did you notice the name change? Anyway about her height you guys were right. I knew she was 5'10 because that's what I put her height in as when I searched a BMI but while I was inserting her height in to the story I guessed my mind blanked. I am so sorry that I didn't post in so long. So… moving on too….responses to your reviews! BTW did you hear that Shake it Up is ending? Now we only have each other. But I saw it coming so I am prepared. It was pretty obvious. All of the cast was moving on to their own things.

TheRock: Thanks. To tell you the truth though, the whole emotion thing probably wouldn't have gotten better if you hadn't helped me and pointed it out so really I should be thanking YOU! So thank you very much.

Rarity01: Thank you to! Interesting fact: I actually was waiting for your review along with TheRock's. You guys are probably two of my FAVORITE reviewers so I'm glad you like it.

Rocky9870**: **Thanks! I am honored that you decided to check out my story. Lately I have been totally obsessed with ALL of your stories!

Guest who called themself Lol: I know right. My childish side was acting up while I was writing the chapter and I had to refrain myself from making Rocky kick him in the back of his head!

midnightsuntellsastory: Thanks! I was kind of angry when I wrote the chapter so he did come off as a bit selfish. I just felt like everyone was expecting for them to be all lovey- dovey and I wanted to shock you.

TeamSethLover: Thank you! At first I really sucked with adding emotions because I was so busy focusing on making it dramatic. So I am very honored to get a compliment, thank you!

emo-rocker101: Thank you! I loved your review. Much.

Urfavgirl: I did that because you don't always get what you want. Would you keep reading my story if you knew that you would get whatever you wanted in the next chapter? And I just can't be that type of predictable writer.

* * *

Rocky's POV

I grin as I step through the front door. CeCe and I erased any sign that showed that we might have been growing apart this afternoon, I feel closer to her than I ever have. We talked about EVERYTHING that involved her life. And then, get this, she had listened to everything I had said about my life! For once I didn't feel like I was just a background dancer in a CeCe concert. I felt like we were BOTH the main stars. That being said, I of course didn't tell her about Ana, but I did tell her about other things that were bothering me. And she actually helped me fix them (which she hasn't done in years). For example (what Rocky says is going to be italics, what "Ana" says is normal, and what CeCe says is bold.)

_I kind of feel intimidated by Lana. She makes me feel insignificant and small._

I can fix that. You aren't small at all young lady. Matter of fact, your far past large.

**Rocky, you are too much of a great person to feel so insignificant. Lana is just an overrated normal person who knows how to walk down a runway. Why do you feel so insignificant anyway?**

_I feel like she's taking all my friends._

No need to worry, I'm sure they were never your friends in the first place.

**Well Rocky I am the most important friend you have and she hasn't taken me. And you know why? Because you are sooooo awesome and no one could EVER take me from you. Not even a model. In my opinion you are, and always will be, my best friend.**

_For ever?_

**You know it sista!**

You have a conceited skinny person as a friend! Congrats (sarcasm) .

* * *

And that's pretty much how the whole day went. We talked about her crush on Jake Demarks, we talked about how much I HATED Jake Demarks, and we talked about how much of a jerk Logan was. To be honest even though I looked like I was angry and I didn't start crying it hurt. I think that is one of the many ways to see that I have changed. The old Rocky would have cried and screamed about how much he had hurt me by saying that, but the new Rocky just took it like a boss. I am getting stronger. That's what an outsider would think at least. I feel like what I'm not showing on the outside is damaging me even more on the inside. Every secret I keep, mine and others, are eating me inside. Speaking of secrets…. As soon as I open the door I see Ty sitting on the couch.

"Hi Ty," I say cheerfully as I smile at him and set the bag full of clothes that I bought with CeCe at the table.

"Hi. Can I talk to you in your room please?" He asks. I sigh. I was kind of hoping that he would say hi and let me get going back to my room. I really want to get in some curl ups before I have to head to dinner and pretend to eat.

"Sure." I say, as we both head up to my room. i have a feeling that i know what this is about. And my suspicions are confirmed when i see my diary laying open on my bed. I know that i definitely didn't leave it there this morning, and i look quickly around my room searching for my little black book that i keep pictures of CeCe in as thinspiration. i know i am just being paranoid though because i know for a fact that i took it with me to the mall with CeCe and that it is in my cute gray tote bag, the one with the bulldog wearing a crown on it.

"What do you want to talk about?" I ask him as i take a seat on the bed and start taking the clothes out of the shopping bag like i don't notice the diary.

"I-I want to talk about dad cheating on mom," he says. I notice that he lowers his voice a little out of pure habit since my mom obviously isn't home. I have to think for a second. I could either pretend that i don't know what he's talking about, i could refuse to talk about it, or i could tell him everything i know about it. I quickly decide on the first idea, since i could follow up with the other two if i needed to from there.

"What are you talking about?" I ask him, staying loyal to my decision.

"Don't give me that bullshit"( yes i do indeed know curse words. Even though i'm 11 i don't think it matters that i know course words as long as i don't use them, i'm just trying to be honest) he growls. It takes all of my self control not to jump backward. I'm not used to seeing Ty so angry. His normal calm and collected demeanor is completely gone. Now he's just plain scary. So, i move on to another tactic.

"Why should I tell you what I know?" I ask him. I lean back waiting for the explosion that i know is coming. Ty is already mad, and the only thing I can think of that gets regular,calm Ty pissed is not knowing things. So I use it to the best of my advantage.

"Because, Rocky! Your not the only person that this will affect! It will affect me, and mom, and dad!" he says. and I have to admit, even though i saw it coming it still stung me to have him yelling at me. The only other time he did that was when he was afraid that i had a crush on Logan. Now he won't ever have to worry about that though because i am sooo far over Logan that i could squash him if i wanted to.

"How do you know that dad cheated on mom anyway?" I ask him. I know that one thing that get's Ty nervous is being caught red handed.

"Is that really important? Let's not beat around the bush here." He answers as he fidgets.

"Look. You said you wanted me to answer some of your questions. And i'm going to. But guess what? Your going to answer my questions before i answer yours!" Even though this is the first time I have really put myself first, it feels natural. Kind of like I am the kind of person that is made to do that. And it really scares me. I have grown up fearing these kind of people, and i definitely don't want to become one of those people.

"Fine. I looked in your journal." He says. even though i knew that he did already, I, again, feel grateful that I brought anything that involved Ana with me in my bag.

"What were you doing in my journal?" i ask him. I try to act cold, stony, basically I try to act like the exact opposite of myself.

"I don't feel like telling you," he has a self satisfied smirk on his face. I have the urge to laugh in his face. The way he said that sounded super immature. But, that's just my opinion.

"You owe it too me!" I scream. I just noticed that the both of us have dropped the whispering voices that we had used at first. Now we are too mad to control our voices.

"I don't owe you anything! You owe me an explanation!" he says. And I once again can't help but to laugh at his immaturity.

"Look, we're not getting anywhere by arguing so much,"I say.

"Fine i'll tell you. I was wondering why you were acting so weird lately. Your getting quieter and quieter and your losing weight" He says.

"And instead of asking me you decided to read my diary?" I say. I am kind of scared of what's going to happen at the end of this.

"Well I-I-thought you had a eating disorder!" He said. I look at him, ready to confess everything. Then i review his words in my head. He said he THOUGHT, which means that now he didn't think that I have one. I have never really thought of Ana as an eating disorder until now though. I have always thought of her as a part of me that just restricted my eating a little more, a part of me that punished me, never as anything else. Now though i realize that Ana is much, much, more than that. I know to be able to pull it off I have to act mad. And it's not very hard. I just have to think of all the other things that i'm angry about. I think about how i'm mad at Steve for coming and making me feel fat, i'm mad at Lana for stealing my friends, i'm mad at Logan for calling me selfish, and i'm mad at CeCe for even allowing us to grow apart in the first place. But most of all, i'm mad at myself for being so disgusting, for letting Lana steal my friends, for standing there while Logan called me selfish, for letting Ana take over, and for allowing CeCe to let us grow apart. I am suddenly utterly disgusted with myself.

"How could you think that?!" I ask as i glare at him.

"You've changed. Your not my baby sister that i know and love. So i found your diary in your bathroom drawer mixed with your, err...feminine hygiene products. And i read it. And when I read it, i figured out that you must be losing weight and getting crankier because of stress instead of an eating disorder," he says. And he has such a genuine look of concern on his face that I almost lose all of my anger toward him. I know no ones used to the "new" Rocky Blue yet. She's way different than the "old" Rocky. And I have to admit, I owe it all to Ana. She's made me appear more fiery, and everyone seems to know better than to mess with me now. No more getting walked all over. I am a new person and I need everyone to know it. Ty isn't the usual "everyone" though. He's my big brother. The person I used to tell all my secrets too, the person who kicked bullies in the butts even if he only thought they were talking about me, and he's the person I know i can always depend on. So I decide to keep my end of the deal.

"Fine, i'll tell you," I find myself saying as I look him in the eye's.

"The whole thing?" He asks.

"yep," I answer as I move into a more comfortable position on my bed.

"The whole truth?" he asks.

"The whole thing. The good, the bad, and the plain old ugly," I say. And trust me, I stay true to my word.

* * *

To be continued. Lol. It won't take so long this time. I already have the whole next chapter and part of the next, next chapter typed up on my computer. I'm just waiting to get a few reviews that I will add at the top and respond to. I love you! I will never stay away for so long again.


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